I want to keep my “hand moving” with my writing and not let the momentum drag. So here I am this morning in front of my computer tapping away. Fortunately, the Deck gave up its next card with the topic about writing anything that comes to mind. This is good. I don’t have to scramble to write on a particular prescribed topic.
So what IS on my mind? Lately, I have been musing about why I write. Is it because I think I am any good? No, I will not be a [insert name of your favorite brilliant writer here]. Nor do I want to make a living at it. That ship put to sea a long time ago after a few rejection letters. Is writing therapeutic for me? Sometimes. Thank goodness I write mostly on a computer because I wouldn’t be able to read some of my tear-soaked handwritten journal entries. Is it fun? Not always. Mostly it is a lot of work and I am kind of lazy.
Why then? I guess it is because I am a bit of a narcissist. I admit it. Even though my stats tell me that not a lot of people read my stuff, still there are enough of you with kind supportive comments to inflate my ego and keep me coming back. Thank you.
In all seriousness, I am the type of person that mostly goes unnoticed in life. I have not done great things, I have a quite ordinary day-job and a pretty boring personal life. So this little form of self-expression on this obscure blog is my way of waving at the world and saying “I’m here! Notice me”.
In the movie Practical Magic, Sally writes a letter to her sister where she wonders if she will ever be loved again. For me that is not the line that stands out in this scene. It is rather her next statement: “I want to be seen.” Yes, that’s me. I want to be seen and I want to be heard.
I used to read a lot, especially at the beginning of the pandemic lockdown. Now, not so much. I can’t say why. Is it because I am tired? Depressed? I have not been writing either. I”ve run out of things to say. Could it be that not writing has disrupted my desire to read? Or is not reading derailing my desire to write? Neither have I been drumming. That I assumed because I need to have a group and I stopped going to drum circle last year. I have been making art, working in the garden, and cooking. But how much longer will that last? It seems that anything to do with words has been gummed up. Too much effort? I don’t know. Maybe a disruption to my reading/writing– that is, my WORD addiction– is just one more consequence of this past year. Don’t know. And right now I am too tired to care.
November amber: Where sunshine sleeps until the coming of Spring.
ljgloyd (c) 2020
I believe in science. I have little patience for flat-earthers who ignore basic, observable evidence, or those who won’t wear masks during a pandemic because …. well, I really don’t understand their “because”. They make no sense.
That being said, I am open-minded enough to believe in the possibility of things that don’t have a readily available scientific explanation.
For example, I have, for decades, practiced various types of energetic practices such as qigong, tai chi chuan, and yoga– practices intended to move vital life force energy (Qi) through the body to optimize good health I receive acupuncture treatments and take Chinese herbs for the same reason–they break up stagnant Qi. I engage in these practices because I can observe the outcome: I feel better afterwards.
So for the time-being, I will be content to embrace the mystery and assume that one day our methods of scientific research will shed more light on the existence and operation of something so basic as our vital life force.
Here are two fascinating clips from the classic Bill Moyer’s documentary about Qi and traditional Chinese medicine. In the second video, I appreciate the young man’s comments about advancing our methods of studying Qi.
ljgloyd (c) 2020
On the Sunday after the election,
I turned off the chorus of cable news pundits,
Called a friend and chatted for an hour,
Zoomed to virtual church for a drink from my spiritual well,
Washed my kitchen floor.
I listened to the wind rattling my windows and stirring up
Then I pondered how to rebuild the bridges between
old friends and anonymous adversaries
and then realized how tough
it is going to be.
ljgloyd (c) 2020
Today is the Feast Day of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals and ecology. Our church had a blessing of the animals service via Zoom. Participants brought their dogs and cats to their computer to receive the blessing from our priest.
I don’t have any pets right now. I attended the Zoom anyway and requested that we remember the variety of creatures that live in my backyard: squirrels, feral cats, raccoons, hummingbirds, bees, butterflies, and a family of raucous crows. They are part of the ecology of neighborhood.
Also, here is something else in honor of the day:
Ten years ago—I can’t believe it’s been that long—I was big into photo manipulation and the creation of what I called “Digital Constructions”. I made a deck of cards depicting a series of animal archetypes. This card, the Raven, was a manipulation of a photo of a raven I took in a park Unfortunately, I cannot find the original photograph.
Ljgloyd 2010, 2020
It is day 150 of my new normal. That is, it’s been 150 days since I was sent home to work. And I just found out that we will need to work from home for the rest of the year. It is all good: it’s designed to keep me safe and well. But I freaking need to get out of the house! So yesterday I went to the beach. I went just to walk the Strand because I need the exercise, not to splash around in the waves. It seems like everybody else had the same idea. A lot of people did have their masks on, as did I, but obviously there’s only so much mask wearing you can do when you’re trying to catch a wave.
I made a galette this afternoon, which is just a fancy name for a rustic fruit tart—and “rustic” is just a fancy way of saying “let’s not worry about how it looks – just how good it tastes.” 😀